Sunday, 25 July 2010

The Good Cricket Week That Was

It was a wonderful week of cricket, and they don’t come around often these great cricket weeks. I missed some action, but am packing these news tidbits together here.

The Stanis won a Test against the Aussies and how brilliant this was doesn’t need explanation. It was so damn formidable they took to the streets in Pakistan and celebrated like crazy teens having won a scholarship to America.

Murali got 800 wickets against the Indians, as I expected. It’s a good thing, because 800 is a much nicer number than an annoying 799. What would he have said if someone asked him how many wickets he got? Se-ven-hun-dred-nine-ty-nine?
And now if ever anyone talks about it, I can proudly say he never got me out. Even once.

Figjam (KP) got snubbed by Hampshire because they preferred the balance of some younger lads. It means they have been kind of noncompliant to what the ECB wanted, and KP possibly won’t get any match practice now before the Stani Test. Aamer and Asif, I hope you guys are listening and are prepared with a mean plan.

Haroon Lorgat, the ICC chief executive fellow, has said there might be a Test Championship in 2012 or 2013. It’s to revive interest in the format, but he hasn’t told us whether anybody will actually watch. I will, but will shift my bed before the television then first.

Yesterday I saw cricket being mentioned for the first time in a Belgian newspaper. And it was only to tell Desmond Tutu, former Saffa cleric and activist , would like to spend some of his time watching it now he’s retired. Ignorant fools.

Last is a bit of Saffa news, which had to be included even though they are apparently doing nothing these days. But the dangerous effects of idleness are showing up:

Biff and Bouch are gone off to some place where they’re dressing a third person up in wacky outfits. And Smith is gradually transforming into the real Granny Smith: He's a rather misformed Granny, don't you think?

AB is so bored he decided to have his fit ankle operated (a friend made me realise this) and so he spent his time in hospital playing on his Blackberry and twittering. And now he’s got it in his head to use the time with his swollen ankle to promote his debut CD. Which I’m warning you, will be out on the 2nd of August.

And Dale Steyn has opened his account on twitter too, but apparently doesn't know it's meant to tweet with. Apart from one toilet break, he hasn't told much.


Stani Army said...

800 wickets against the Indians? Bloody hell, how many did he get against everyone else? And do the statisticians know?

Pietersen hardly ever turns up to county games because he is seen as special and only saved for the national side where he doesn't even bloody do anything.

It'll have to be bed next to t.v, toilet next to bed, next to sink, next to shower, next to the left over mithai I sent back to you. I was thinking, maybe you can call Smithy around and have him help you finish the mithai off? Ahh, don't thank me, I'm full of ideas.

sunny said...

I thought I was being ambiguous there and of course you were the one to get it wrong about the 800 wickets.

Stani, why hadn't I better shift the bathroom and kitchen all together then in my bedroom?
And you needn't worry about the mithai, I've already sent it back to you with the express delivery service. Check out on your doorstep.

Stani Army said...

...I'm going to remove my doorstep :)

That will make all the difference!

sunny said...

Oh, you think so?
I'll tell them to empty the container on top of your bed and tell them not to care even if you're asleep on it. :P

Stani Army said...

mmmm heaven...err, I mean, yuk! [Makes speedy exit]