Sunday, 29 August 2010

To hell with the cheating

I didn’t know I would be greeted with so much wretched news from the Pakistan camp after waking up. So yeah, they’ve sadly managed to get themselves again in another big mess. And it seems to be a really disastrous mess this time around with bad consequences.

When this kind of crap happens, you’re always tempted to have a reaction of disbelief. Like wait no, see there isn’t evidence enough yet...let the whole investigation come to a conclusion might be all faked. It’s what I’ve very often done. I haven’t always been right, but at least it was the kind of benign self-delusion rather than deliberate ignorance that got me through supporting this Pakistan team.

I’m afraid the trick isn’t going to last long anymore. To be candid, my favourite team they never have actually been, I’ve always kept them second. And even then it never exactly was the Pakistani cricket team I supported, it was Pakistan. You don’t support players that don’t give a shit for their country and it’s integrity. At least I hope I don’t.

Media stories I normally don’t swallow easily, because everything is so often blown out of proportion and combined with poppycock. Being gullible and taking all they give isn’t advisable, which is why NOTW’s reports haven’t convinced me yet entirely. But that something bad has happened, I won’t deny. Trying imagine the whole situation in the best possible way is all what I can do.

What wretches me most is that the Pakistani fans don’t deserve this. If there’s one thing in that troubled country which still keeps people happily engaging together, then that’s cricket. But when cricketers every time again say ‘Piss off losers, we’ve got our pockets to fill’ , then well, this entity won’t last long. Or at least not retain it’s value.

There are a million things left I could say, but words just don’t encompass feelings the right way now. I’m numbed and it’s still sinking in. How this everything has brought the game into disrepute and Amir’s fate is what concerns me most, but I can’t write about it now. It’s because I’m feeling like shit and know one of cricket’s most interesting though controversial teams might be ending in a way many wouldn’t have wanted. I’m still hopeful that the worst doesn’t happen, but you can’t feel the same way when you know you’ve been cheated.

And I bloody feel like being cheated.


mspr1nt said...

Brave writing something already. I'm waiting for my emotions to stabalize. They are so all over the place at the moment that I don't want to risk writing something that I will 1. regret later 2. might get in trouble for.

Most saddened by Aamer :( current reports suggest that he was bullied into it, amen.

sunny said...

I just had to get it out Ant, I know I won't be able to write about it later.
But sadly it's how I really feel at the moment-horrible and cheated.

I feel worst for Aamer too, it's very likely he's been coerced into doing all of this.

Stani Army said...

Well said Sunny.

These players don't appreciate how much of a privileged position they are in as cricketers in a country like Pakistan. Rather than acknowledge this, they abuse their status for self gain while the Pakistan fan suffers. But they don't care.

To hell with the rest but I am so disappointed in Amir.

sunny said...

That's correct Stani, earning the big bucks is a nice thing but responsibility comes along with it too. The Pakistani cricketers are close to becoming like the politicians of the same place.

And Aamer being involved is one of the things that concerns me most too. Such a young age and already in such serious trouble. *sigh