Saturday 26 February 2011

Say Hello to Imran Tahir

Ladies and gents and chickens and hens, South Africa have just introduced their new and immaculately polished product. It's golden-sprayed at the top and is claimed to be a leggie.

It's called Imran Tahir.

You are very welcome to think that I'm a very late+lame advertiser or product introducer (I've never been a brick in marketing names. You're welcome to enlighten me), but that's probably because my other occupations have still not been reported to the police.

Anyhow, Imran Tahir.

I'm not going to delve into how bloody awesome he is, or the angles and peerless techniques of his bowling. It is enough to know that the Aussies are trying to kidnap him, so we are guarding him in a cage made of T-rex bones and the Boofus Biff himself keeps the keys with him. Ps- don't even try Ricky. The BB bites and doesn't even brush his teeth.

What I'm more interested in saying is that South Africa should actually play him now that they've let us all say hello to him. Does it feel great to say 'hello' to a new bloke only to later learn he's been locked away in some murky cellar? I think so not.
It looked slightly insane to play with three spinners against the Windies, and not because we reputedly only have doorknob-fiddlers. The idea behind it likely was to put the three of them under scrutiny. Not so stupid then, but none of them really failed. Robbie P will still be the guy having to move out, and probably because Botes thought he'd take a couple of wickets. Cunning robot.

The second thing about Tahir was him kissing the Protea badge, while he is a Stani. I'm very cockahoop about him playing for us, but he can keep those Figjammy works away from the public, else the public is going to think he's cocky and a traitor. And he doesn't look like a cocky traitor even though I'm massively opposed to his suspicious-looking dyed hair.

I thought you'd say hello to his wife too, who is also the reason why he's in the Saffa team


Stani Army said...

Give us him back! Or I'll tell England to steal more Saffas.

sunny said...

Ah no Stani, Tahir came to Saffaland himself. If you force him to go back, you're not giving him the freedom of choice. :P
Oi, I can also tell England to steal a few more Stanis and they might actually be interested in that option considering a Stani (Shahzad) made the tie possible today.

Stani Army said...

Fine, how about just his wife then?

Well if they had turned to Shahzad at the death instead of the world's most boring person, Jimmy Anderson, then they would have made it.

Soon, all teams will be full of Stanis just like the 100m is full of brothers. God has given us a natural cricketing gift. We're like a disease....a good disease, and soon the world will be ours, all ours, doohoohahaha

Our recent deployments have been agent Khawaja and agent Tahir ;)