Saturday, 9 October 2010

All the Rustiness...

South Africa's season finally kicked off yesterday and they're off to a great limping start already. A grossly great damned limping start. I can't call it much else considering they let the Zimbos flow to a score of 168 even if they won by seven wickets afterwards.

Saffers aren't really good at opening their season in majestic style, therefore they hire about every year their neighbours to play some cricket in their grounds, and normally treat it nothing more than the equivalent of some practice. Our new robot captain, Botha, however said they're going to take this game very seriously. So seriously you saw the disastrous results of it creeping out yesterday.

The bowling was total rubbish. Parnell took a couple of wickets but was too expensive, Rusty is mad, and Morne twisted his ankle. He wanted to be in the hospital with Albie.
The lousiest part of the match was South Africa's fielding. Normally supersensationality and alertness is associated with their fielding, but yesterday it was just HORRENDOUS. No wait, that is an understatement; it was so atrociously pathetic that even three blind mice with rheumatism would have done better. Shame on you all.

"Morne, I never even went to the hospital. It's a shame I know will have to take your place in the side."

An interesting part of yesterday's game was observing how Biff would go about things now that he isn't captain anymore. Cricinfo called him an 'anonymous' presence on the field (anonymous with such a size? Don't let me laugh), but I bet he was smirking there in some corner of how Botha's first day as captain was being battered into little horrors.
'Haha', he thought, "See how everything is going in tatters for Botes. The moron probably thought he could take over the job from me, but through his calf-mindedness today and probably in years to come people are going to revere me as the wonderful past captain."

If Biff was a complete doofus he had probably not scored that fifty later on and helped SA win the match. But a small functioning part of his brain figured out that the selectors can really kick him out of the team if he doesn't perform because he isn't skipper anymore. Get it? There was the glory to get too of course. Smith considers it to be a gigantic cheeseburger now.

I felt sorry for the Zimbos though. They played really well and probably deserved to win more than the Saffers, but they don't have to worry, Grant Flower is coming tomorrow to kick some real ass around.


Stani Army said...

Choking already? That's what I like to see. Start as you mean to go on. UAE is waiting :)

Smithy was just there for the mid-innings snack

Did you get to see this match Sunny?

sunny said...

Don't be so optimistic, we're actually getting the choking out of the way through these matches of little importance.

I wasn't at home but caught the last of Zim's innings and a glimpse of the Saffer innings.

Wes playforcountrynotforself said...

Rusty isn't mad, he's wonderful. So happy he finally got picked. Only took them like 500 years. Hopefully they'll keep him.

sunny said...

It's him being mad (or at least eerie) which makes him wonderful for me. For the T20s I think they will keep him but for the ODIs I'm afraid it won't be so. :(